Tolon Wilile ("The Party is On!")

 ATTENTION READERS: You are cordially invited to attend.....
 
 For the past two weeks, I have been busy.  In search of a defense mechanism. Seriously, but with tongue in cheek (a grain of salt).  Lo and behold!  The fix? A nice brand of escapism.  Okay, listen, listen.  Soon after joining the IVF community at large, it became evident to me that while I can really listen to collective blues (you know, BB King (I Like to Live the Love), Albert King (Blues Power) and Koko Taylor (I'm a Woman)), individual tales told in blue keys threaten to kill me.  I'm empathic, and what I think and read, I feel.  And what others feel, I feel.  In my gut.  Hold on don't leave me yet.  There are Sistren who are truly tormented with their fertility status (the other "in-" word  hurts when I use it). They and we blog and we are in the same club.  But I can't (caint-not in the vernacular) read and adsorb their words and experiences without paying the price of a hot belly and achy joints.  And tears for them.   I know someone out there understands me!

     The stakes for my silly self (cause I'm usually giggling as I write you must know) since yesterday became even higher when my RE (reproductive endocrinologist/test tube baby doc) figured out a way to have me making a baby in a laboratory by January 1st.  The Party is On! Just in time to pay my newly discovered yearly deductible of $200.00 twice in thirty days. In less than thirty days I may be pregnant.  That is a maybe full of waits.   As the stakes grow higher, I have really got to use my imagination (my favorite word, second to sublime) to figure out how to help myself and others who are going through this too.  What to do?

When I was in undergrad, one of my sweet African friends shared with me that where she was from, when a woman had her period it was customary to cater to her by having a party!  Her favorite foods and music filled the house.  What a good idea!  Nutrition and mental health intervention to promote wellness....for fertility and sanity.

      Please don't judge me now too harshly.  Remember I am an aspiring midwife and a nurse.  This is what we do: develop interventions to promote the health and well being of people, families and communities.  We also devise these to help them overcome, to hope and cope.  So, as my doctor asks my chocolate guy to give me weeks of shots in my high hip (BTW my protocol will be the Luteal/Estrace/Ganirelix,  each med no more than $35.00 for 30-day supply ) I must find the humor and some levity (BTW, he will not be doing that!).  Gotta find a way to be okay!  So this party has a twofold purpose.  It will serve as my theme music so to speak.  Or background music when the ignorant, or insensitive, or know-it-all folks, or professors, or even my Chocolate Guy gets on the nerve that runs from my brain to my womb.  So I am programming myself for this one.  Here it goes.  " Niqi, you do not want some kids running around your house at your age....what if you have eight, just don't ask ME to babysit.....and so on."  It also gets me up off of my backside allowing blood to flow there, while getting creative meridians going. Seriously on that one.

     If you find me, it will be here cooking and dancing and listening to music for the next thirty days or so.  My ongoing IVF party.  We started our Saturday off with some Soukous, Zouk and Compas, Calypso and Cuban. Drop on by if you are so inclined.  There will be food and laughter with a log on the fire, and we will be waiting for you.  RSVP by commenting and let me know what your fave party song is!

Jammin & Eating Bird of Paradise Pie,


The Chocolate Cyster



Pata Pata time (Miriam Makeba)

The Party is On! (Salif Keita)